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Top 10 List for John Kerry's Running Mate
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US Brings Modern Torture Techniques to Iraqi Prisons
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Iraq Back in Axis of Evil; US Loses Spot in Axis of Good
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Bush and Cheney Put on a Puppet Show for 9/11 Commission
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Withdrawal of Dominican Republic Troops Jeopardizes American Effort in Iraq
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Woodward Fecally Implodes on C-SPAN
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Mary J. Blige is Having Ed Bradley's Child
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Queer Eye for Jack Palethorpe
The Fab Five try to give Jack a “makeover”... Full story
Top 10 Things Not to Say on a First Date, by the Wizard of Love
Expert advice from the experienced Wizard... Full story
Save a Virgin
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Gangsters and Gun Molls: Ralph Nader
Comic book cover by blorno... Full story
Carl's Letters: There Should be a Constitutional Amendment Against Bonobo Chimps
Instead of fighting, they have sex... Full story
I Came First
Stupid Drawings from a stupid stupid man... Full story
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Top 10 Things Not to Say on a First Date, by the Wizard of Love
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1. You don't sweat much for a fat girl!
2. Do you have any pictures of your girlfriends?
3. I broke up with my last girlfriend because she wasn't into bondage.
4. I broke up with my last boyfriend because he expected to have sex once a week!
5. Why is it your own farts smell okay to you?
6. Don't you find that bras are too confining?
7. I have Multiple Personality Disorder but try to look at it like double dating.
8. Is that a mole or do you have a Milk Dud stuck to your face?
9. You know, Viagra takes an hour to work. Should I take one now before we eat?
10. In case you were thinking of asking, I did bring a condom.
E-mail the Wiz at wizard@bongonews.com. |
Read these related stories:
Observation Test (17-Dec-03)
Optical Illusion (21-Apr-04)
The Effects of Six Beers on Dating (11-Feb-04)
Study Discovers Why Men Die Younger Than Women (17-Sep-03)
Results of the Man of the Year Contest (10-Sep-03)
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