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Kerry Says Bush Can't Walk and Chew Gum at the Same Time
NEW YORK John Kerry accused President Bush of being unable to do two things at once. "You can't say you're just going to focus on the war on terror and ignore the economy," said Kerry. "If I am elected as your President, I'll focus on my job as well as on spending Teresa's money!"
"Of course I know how to do two things at once," responded Bush, grimacing petulantly. "Heck, I gave the order to invade Iraq while playing golf!"
"Bush is planning a January surprise," countered Kerry, as his nose began to grow." He'll eliminate Social Security and Medicare, bring back the draft, restart the Vietnam war, put Rush Limbaugh on the Supreme Court, audit my tax return, and deport Teresa!"
"I have a plan for everything," said Kerry. "I even have plans to make plans."