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Hilary Duff Goes Slutty
LOS ANGELES — Britney Spears and Christine Aguilera have previously gone the steamy, risqué route. But not Hilary Duff. Until now, that is.
Bongo News has learned that Hilary, America’s reining teen queen, has shed her Lizzie McGuire, goody two shoes image and gone slutty. The idol of the training-bra set has thrown away her fluffy pink cardigans, gained some weight to bulk up her titties, lip-locked a porn star, and married a backup singer.
“I want some boy fans,” said Hilary. “I’m sick of stupid little girls squealing at me. I want guys, the red-blooded type.
“Growing up means different things to different people. For some, it’s college, a career and a family. For me it’s sex, drugs and rock ‘n roll!”
Development psychologists said they were pleased by her transformation. “She was stuck in a pre-teen, delusional state,” said one psychologist. “It wasn’t healthy. I was worried about her. I think she’s in a much better place now. Can you show me the photo of her with the porn star again?”
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