BONGO NEWS Satire. Parody. Jokes. MAY 11, 2005 Copyright © 2001-2017 Bongo News, Inc.
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Tom Cruise Explodes With Desire for Katie Holmes
... Full story

Britney Spears' Diary - Kevin Got Another Backup Singer Pregnant!
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Ben Affleck Denies He is the Father of Jennifer Garner's Baby
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Bush Senior Adopts Bill Clinton
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Jeb Bush Appointed "Country Roads,' the Secretary of Transportation
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Separated at Birth: Pope Benedict and The Evil Emperor from Star Wars
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Cute Cat Photos
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Did You Hear the One About the Dyslexic Agnostic With Insomnia?
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The Gay Corinthian: Ben Affleck
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Comics We'd Like to See: The Wizard of Idiot
With apologies to The Wizard of Id... Full story

Tom Cruise Explodes With Desire for Katie Holmes

ROME — During a 10-year marriage to Nicole Kidman and two and a half years dating Penelope Cruz, Tom Cruise never showed much passion in public. And, apart from him acting opposite Nicole in a nude kissing scene in Eyes Wide Shut, Tom's fans were never treated to very much in the way of public displays of affection by Tom.

Indeed, several months ago, Penelope confided in Bongo News that, in all their months of dating, she never got to see Tom's cruise missile (see the ad by Penelope in Bongo News Personals). But Tom is a consummate actor, so our seeing some passion from Tom was not mission impossible.

It was definitely blast-off time for Tom when he appeared in Rome last week at the Italian Film Awards with lovely Katie Holmes. Unable to control his passions, Tom smothered Katie with kisses in front of a hundred paparazzi assembled for his arrival at the auditorium.

"It was spontaneous combustion," said Tom said later. "I couldn't help myself. I'm a private person and don't generally display intimacy in public. But as I stepped out of the limo and the flash bulbs went off, I had my own series of explosions. Katie looked so alluring with the flashes of light bouncing of her ample bosoms. I just had to kiss her and kiss her and kiss her""

Inside the auditorium, and away from the flash bulbs, Tom was able to regain control of his feelings, and managed to not kiss Katie for the next three hours.


Will Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes Stay Together?

Check the answers you believe are true:
Tom Cruise will marry Katie and have many babies by natural means
Some of the babies may be by artificial insemination
Katie's contract says the romance will last for 15 months

Emma Dubin

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