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www.bongonews.com OCTOBER 19, 2005 Copyright © 2001-2010 Bongo News, Inc.
   
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Nicole Kidman Says Tom Cruise’s Pregnancy is Emission Impossible


cruise holmes pregnancy nicole

LOS ANGELES — Nicole Kidman has come out swinging against her former husband, accusing him of unfairly impregnating his girlfriend, Katie Holmes, when he failed to do so after 10 years of marriage with her.

“How come I had to adopt two freakin’ kids?” said Nicole in her Aussie accent. “How come he never showed me his cruise missile?”

Meanwhile, officials from the Church of Scientology have revealed that it is not Katie Holmes who is pregnant. It is Tom!

“We believe in virgin birth,” said L. Ron Hubbard, who is still very much alive on the Scientology website. “And Tom is a virgin.”

Emma Dubin
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Read these related stories:

Tom Cruise Explodes With Desire for Katie Holmes (11-May-05)

Tom Cruise: “I Have Sex All Over My Holmes” (8-Jun-05)

Tom Cruise: “Katie Digs Scientology” (15-Jun-05)

Matt Lauer Lapses Into Coma After Lecture From Tom Cruise (29-Jun-05)

War of the Worlds - Tom Cruise Versus Reality (6-Jul-05)




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