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Judge Rules Warren Buffett Incompetent at Request of His Relatives
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Judge Rules Warren Buffett Incompetent at Request of His Relatives




OMAHA, Nebraska — At the request of every member of Warren Buffett's family, a state judge has reviewed the financial and personal records leading up to Buffett's decision to give $32 billion, the lion's share of his fortune, to charity.

Judge James Bean ruled Buffett retroactively incompetent, thereby nullifying all transactions and contracts as well as retracting all statements made by the batty billionaire in past last thirty days.

Bubba Buffett, the billionaire's thirty-five-year-old son, was greatly relieved by Judge Bean's decision and will quickly move to have his father placed in a private extended care facility at an undisclosed location. "Daddy is a very sick man," he told a crowd of reporter's gathered at the Omaha courthouse. "The starving multitudes will just have to wait a while longer."

Buffett, on the other hand, was furious with the ruling and upon emerging from the courthouse vowed to punch his son and his son's lawyers in the nose. He was immediately restrained, placed in a straight jacket, charged with making terroristic threats, and led back into the courthouse.

Sim Namore
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