BONGO NEWS Satire. Parody. Jokes. JANUARY 18, 2006 Copyright © 2001-2018 Bongo News, Inc.
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Bush Diary - I-Ran Has WMD's, We're Pretty Sure About It This Time

Bush Dairy
Dear Jernal,
Don't worry, I will use diplomacy when dealing with I-Ran. Having said that, all opshons are on the table, including but not limited to the nucular opshon. I-Ran has WMD's, we're pretty sure about it this time. Unfortuantly, the ecanomy is doing so well we cannot afford to spend money on any more wars. So tax cuts to the rescue! We will slash salaries, health care, medicare, privitize Social Security, make up crazy laws so we can fine peeple, level New Oar-lands to the ground, and cut veterands benefits and food stampers. That way, we can afford this war!

Sure I-Ran had elecshons, but the leeder went a little Coo-Coo Roo Cabanas. So what if they had elecshons, if a leeder is not doing there job, they should be forcefully removed from power. The leader of I-Ran is the only leeder I can think of that fits that criteria. We will bring democracy to the peeples of I-Ran, and then give them John Kerry-boo. Heck, he isn't doing anything impawtant.

Good news about Alaska. We opened land for drilling that even Ronald Ray-gun woundn't. No why? Cause he's a pansy! This land will provide us with oil that will last for at least three months, eliminating the oil crisis coming in a few years. See, I'm planning ahead for the next five years. It is your children that will have to pay off them massive deficit, not you, so why are you complaining?


P.S. We are not pulling troopers out of I-Rock now! Even though sixty percent of Americans want us out of I-Rock now, I still have a mandate. Yup, 51 percent of the peeple voted for me, and that's all that matters! Now I am off to spy on Christina I'm-A-Poor.

The Bush Diary was obtained by KDANTEATER

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