BONGO NEWS Satire. Parody. Jokes. OCTOBER 26, 2005 Copyright © 2001-2017 Bongo News, Inc.
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Recipes of the World: Sicilian Funeral Dinner

Recipes of the World

This week's recipe:

Sicilian Funeral Dinner by the Widow Stompano

Items needed:
It happened so suddenly I don't have much time to prepare. I've got to plan the meal for about 80 close associates of my Giovanni who are going to be here to show their respect. I need olives, sardines, pasta, tomatoes, eggplant, garlic, olive oil, cheese, my secret love potion, and strychnine.

The girls are going to have to make the main meal. I've got to put on my push-up bra, pinch in my waist, and make up my lips. Luckily, I had the black dress ready.

Give the cappos their food first. Since I think Guido did it, I'll put a few drops of strychnine on his food. And I'll put a few drops on Big Luigi's food because he's always trying to put his greasy hands all over my body. But I'll put love potion on Carlo's food. He doesn't know it yet, but he'll be my next husband. I wonder if I still fit into my wedding dress?

Read these related stories:

Recipes of the World - Papua New Guinea: Baked Tribesman (20-Aug-03)

Recipes of the World - Pakistan: Mud Cakes (27-Aug-03)

Recipes of the World - England: Spotted Dick (3-Sep-03)

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