LONDON The British government's intelligence dossier accusing Saddam Hussein of deception is itself a work of deception. The government has admitted that the dossier did not come from intelligence reports, but from magazine articles.
"MI5 isn't what it used to be," said M. "Ever since Austin Powers was unfrozen, our intelligence gathering has been crap."
The questionable veracity of the report came to light when reporters noticed references to Julia Roberts, Lady Di and Brad Pitt in the descriptions of plastic explosives, munitions stockpiles and biological agents.
This has become a major embarrassment not only for Prime Minister, Tony Blair, but also for Colin Powell, who in a UN speech praised the dossier as a "fine paper."
When asked to comment, Powell said, "Well, at least it's printed on high-quality paper."
"Nobody thinks any less of Tony Blair," he added. "His poll numbers already stink."