This week's recipe:
Pakistani Mud Cakes, by Chef Wynona Ridarshan
2-3 lbs dirt, but not from bathroom area of village.
Because I am beautiful, stupid date vendor doesn't see me grab a handful of dates and put them under my dress. Then I go to the goat herder to smile prettily while stealing some milk when he isn't looking. Then I go to the millet merchant and bend over a lot like I dropped something and when he helps me look for it I steal some millet. But I only steal from food stalls and baskets. I no longer steal from sacks.
Mix all ingredients together and shape into flat cakes and place on a hot rock in the 110 degree sun until done to a crisp.
Serve with a subservient smile to village elder if you want to get ahead in the world.